I first became depressed in May 2018.

In the years since, my life has been filled with laughter, friendship, love, adventure, curiosity and joy, but all along, humming in the background (and often screaming in the foreground) has been the track of depression and its myriad manifestations.

Quite quickly I found that writing allowed me to process my emotions in a way that thought and speech could not. In particular, writing verse and the pursuit of lyricism gave me a sense of purpose when I really needed one.

This collection of poems reflects five years of changing influences, concerns and beliefs, and when I look back now, I think that they are all in some degree an attempt to understand my depression.

Despite these five years having held some of the best experiences of my life, the reality is that when my emotions are positive, I prefer to live and share them rather than write them. So yes, these pages are often painted by the heavy grey brush of depression, but I hope you will find some joy and hope in them too, because that, ultimately, is what they gave me.

Hugo